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Saturday, April 27th
What's cooler than building a monorail in your backyard? Building a backyard rollercoaster!
By: Dave
Saturday, Apr 27th 2002 (12:06am)
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Friday, April 26th
Lisa Lopes, better known as 'Left Eye' from TLC and 'that chick who burned down Andre Rison's house', has died in a car crash. If only she had an airbag taped to her glasses instead of a rubber, huh?
By: Dave
Friday, Apr 26th 2002 (8:18am)
If anyone can figure out what the hell this crap is all about.... let me know.
By: Scott
Friday, Apr 26th 2002 (12:49am)
"We thought about something like 'Here you can sneer at the plastic Yankee culture,' or 'Try our fries - we know they aren't really French,' but we wanted to capture both the unique American character of our company and pass on our sentiments to the French people, who are mostly snobby, cheese-eating surrender monkeys," said McDonalds VP of European Markets Dale Jeffords.
By: Dave
Friday, Apr 26th 2002 (12:40am)
Gene Simmons, breaking character just long enough to utter a few non-self-indulgent sentences, announced a plan to help Sharon and Arafat kiss and make up.
By: Dave
Friday, Apr 26th 2002 (12:35am)
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Wednesday, April 24th
This is the one and only Moto-Penis (AKA DilDozer).
By: Dave
Wednesday, Apr 24th 2002 (11:44pm)
Hey! Pull my finger!
By: Dave
Wednesday, Apr 24th 2002 (11:40pm)
You better be REAL CAREFUL in the restroom for now on... you can slip on your own shit and die!
By: chimpy
Wednesday, Apr 24th 2002 (8:54am)
Want to be single again? Divorce too painful? Too poor to afford a hit man? Give your wife a plane ticket and never see her again!
By: chimpy
Wednesday, Apr 24th 2002 (8:52am)
Be careful everyone - you can go to jail if you attack a cop with your pussy!
By: chimpy
Wednesday, Apr 24th 2002 (8:49am)
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Tuesday, April 23rd
Hey, cool, there's a database of the creatures from the new Star Wars movie - including this vicious beast.
By: Dave
Tuesday, Apr 23rd 2002 (11:34pm)
Golf usually doesn't affect me like this, but for some reason, I get a boner when I look at this picture.
By: Dave
Tuesday, Apr 23rd 2002 (11:33pm)
RIP: Linda Lovelace, one-time Ivory Soap girl, star of 'Deep Throat', and ultimately anti-porn crusader, has died from injuries related to a car accident. She was 53. She may have been a lot of different things, but she'll always be the chick with a clit in her throat to me.
By: Dave
Tuesday, Apr 23rd 2002 (11:30pm)
Linda Lovelace may be gone, but the one movie that everyone remembers her from lives on... in ASCII that is!
By: chimpy
Tuesday, Apr 23rd 2002 (6:23pm)
Monday, April 22nd
A Phoenix man, under the influence of PCP, bit off his 2-year-old son's thumb and swallowed it, in an attempt to 'match their DNA'. Understandably, he's now in custody and on suicide watch.
By: Dave
Monday, Apr 22nd 2002 (11:49pm)
What, you need to hear it twice?? LITE BRITE!!!
By: Dave
Monday, Apr 22nd 2002 (11:44pm)
The latest quiz to hit the streets: What High School Stereotype Are You? Due to a lack of options, I ended up being classified as 'Goth' - you'd have to know me to know how ridiculously off that is. I was actually a leftist pothead surfer-wannabe. Goth, indeed! PSHAW!
By: Dave
Monday, Apr 22nd 2002 (11:36pm)
Don't you know that 2/3 of the world SQUAT while they take a dump? Here's the product to help you out.
By: chimpy
Monday, Apr 22nd 2002 (7:09pm)
When you need a touch of elegance with your candle-lit tuna mac dinner, reach for the Wal-Mart wine.
By: Dave
Monday, Apr 22nd 2002 (1:20am)
Poontos! The pussy mint!
By: Dave
Monday, Apr 22nd 2002 (1:18am)
Man, the stupidest things crack me up - like British Road Signs Sing Gloria Gaynor.
By: Dave
Monday, Apr 22nd 2002 (1:17am)
Sunday, April 21st
Tired of berating yourself? Get abuse from the pro... it's the FULL METAL JACKET soundboard. Sgt. Hartman is waiting for you...
By: chimpy
Sunday, Apr 21st 2002 (2:36pm)
Here's my sunday submission: Betty is a better christian than you. Really! And she has her own website to prove it.
By: chimpy
Sunday, Apr 21st 2002 (12:55pm)
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