TOASTS: 247       VOTES: 19289


Bill Brasky once boxed a glacier and won by K.O.9.33
Though some people have been known to "drink like a fish", fish in fact drink like Brasky. 9.010
I once saw Bill Brasky shoot an elephant with a potato gun. That elephant was smart though, he played dead. Knowing that of course Brasky is just a sport hunter.8.810
Bill Brasky doesn't use a cell phone, he yells loudly.8.73
Bill Brasky has eyefucked the Dali Lama.8.73
Bill Brasky once head butted his own mother on mothers day for calling him William. 8.26
Bill Brasky once smacked Stevie Wonder so hard he could see again for 20 minutes. He only did this so Stevie could see him make love to his wife in front of him. Stevie was so inspired that he wrote the song "Superstition".8.171
Bill Brasky hated Mexicans! And he was half Mexican! And he hated irony!8.196
Bill Brasky is a son of a bitch!7.992
Despite having shot himself 3 times in the temple, Bill Braskey has never lost a round of Russian Roulette.7.985


Bill Brasky bricks in frotos mouth in L.O.T.R. 4.1.03
Bill Brasky sells crack for Board Plus!4.186
Bill Brasky speaks with a faint Pig-Latin accent!4.187
Bill Brasky isn't tall. I mean, not like John Stamos tall!4.188
I once seen him eat french fries with french dressing in... France!4.317
Bill Brasky owns the moon, it's a giant booger he picked from his nose and flicked into space.4.471
Brasky is ranked 8th in the AP College Football poll.4.421
Bill Brasky is retarded. And that makes his accomplishments significantly more impressive!4.6108
Bill Brasky is MUCH cooler than Baz4.841
Bill Brasky eats all of his meals with sporks!4.994


Brasky wrote the song "Crocodile Rock". He said it was actually a metaphor for germ warfare.6.3126
One year, for Halloween, Brasky rounded up all the squirrels in the neighborhood, dressed them up like Louie Anderson, and trained them to run his haunted House!5.2125
I once thumbwrestled Bill Brasky, and he put me in a coma for a week. When I awoke, he had sodomized my wife and adopted my son.7.9118
Brasky could open a bottle of beer with his teeth and spit the cap hard enough to put it through a car door.7.4117
Bill Brasky drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.7.1117
Bill Brasky built a car that runs off of bald eagle heads and aborted fetuses!7.2117
Brasky named the group Sha-Na-Na. They did NOT want to be called that.6.2115
I once saw Brasky tie 3 chinamen together and use them as a toothpick at a family picnic!6.3113
Bill Brasky once showed me a video of him making love to my wife, and it was the most beautiful thing I ever saw!7.6112
Bill Brasky once drank two gallons of nitroglycerin to impress a chimpanzee!6.5112